will you be my monica?
There’s something that I’m trying to figure out about myself. For a long time now, I’ve believed that I love to run. I have told many people that I love to run. I usually list it as one of the things that I “do” whenever someone inquires about my hobbies or pastimes. I run.
However, in order to be something that I truly LOVE, I imagine that I would need to actually run more consistently that I have ever been able to. I can’t get myself to get out the door and log miles unless I have an event that I’m training for. And by event I mean race. And by race I mean marathon. I’ve tried signing up for 5k’s and 10k’s, I even ran my first 15k last fall. None of those distances ever persuade me to follow a consistent training pattern. I would run a couple times, to make sure that I was going to be able to complete the distance without embarrassing myself, but not enough to actually improve my running abilities.
So, in order for me to run regularly, I first need to sign up for a marathon (or half-marathon, any thing with the word marathon usually works), but I think I’ve discovered the other ingredient necessary for my motivation sandwich. I need a partner. I need someone who is going to care about all my aches and pains. I need someone who is going to meet me for an early morning run or call me when she doesn’t feel like going running after work. I need to run in community.
There’s something weird that happens to me when I start to train, I see the world through the eyes of a runner. Everything that happens to me either becomes fuel for my run when I need to pound out my frustrations, or inspiration for my run when I’m feeling strong and powerful. I’ve realize that there are not many people who understand this obsession that I periodically develop. With the exception of my training partners. They always seem to understand.
I have had some amazing women train with me. First, there is Andi. Whom I love. Andi and I worked at summer camp together the year after my second half-marathon. I remember the first day, I was in the lodge finding out where my cabin was going to be and she walked in a pair of running shorts on and I asked her if she was a runner. I don’t remember her exact response, but she did say that she had just run her first 5k and she really enjoyed it. From that day on we would get up before dawn and run. Everyday. I loved my early morning runs with Andi. Somedays we would chat. Somedays we would just listen to our own breathing. Somedays we would be chased by crazy blind dogs. By the end of the summer we were running 10 mile long runs on Sunday morning and Andi had signed up for her first half-marathon.
After she finished that half, we were chatting back and forth and I don’t remember who suggested it first, but somehow we decided to sign up for the Lincoln Marathon in May. Our main challenge to being training partners was that she lived in Michigan and I lived in Nebraska, so we couldn’t actually run together. We started emailing regularly, giving each other detailed break-downs of our runs and our plans to run. I think we were able to physically run together twice during the 6 month training cycle. I don’t know how, but it worked perfectly. We paced together exactly, like we were born to run together.
Then I moved to Vermont. I remember the day that I found my second running partner. We were at a dinner party hosted by a mutual acquaintance, and somehow found ourselves talking about marathoning. At this point, even though I had run one marathon and two half marathons, I had a hard time calling myself a runner (I still sometimes shrug off this label, but that’s a whole different issue). I was a little intimidated talking to Judy because she was obviously in better shape than me, so there was no way I could ever dream of running a race with her. After that day, we became fast friends. I invited her to Jazzercise, and knew that we would be forever friends when she would still associate with me after her first class (most people are scared off by the mere mention of jazz hands).
Judy ended up becoming my roommate and I talked her into running another marathon. After her last one she had decided that she just didn’t enjoy going that far in one day. We sometimes ran together, sometimes separately. I must say that some of the most beautiful and fulfilling run were with Judy as we explored the back country roads outside of Montpelier.
Both of those extraordinary women shared some of the best and worst times of my life, training for and participating in marathons. And I was priviledge to have them both stand up with me at my wedding.
That brings me to the present. KT, bless her heart, has become my third marathon-bound training teammate. And I love her for it. Before Christmas she and I were talking about exercising and fitness and she discovered that I’d run marathons before. She got very excited and asked all kinds of questions. I told her that I believe that anyone is capable of running that distance, you just have to decide and if you’re me, you need a training partner. She and I then joked around about the episode of Friends where Monica becomes Chandler’s “training partner” trying to help him lose some weight that he’d gained. She goes WAY over the top with her exercise enthusiasm, and truth be told that is exactly like me. I can be VERY enthusiastic.
So a couple days after that conversation, KT send me a facebook message asking, “Will you be my Monica?” My heart literally skipped a beat. Having someone to train with and coach along the process is exactly what I need to resurrect my love of running. I was so excited I almost started crying. I love moments like that when I get a better understanding of who I am and how I work. I need to combine fitness with relationship, otherwise I won’t succeed.
I thank these women: Andi, Judy, and KT. You have made my life better. You inspire me to be a better version of myself and I love you!
